It’s been years since I’ve written online. I didn’t intend to take a break, I just… did.
Since it’s been a minute, I wanted to reintroduce myself.
Hi! My name’s Jason. I’m a former professional magician, former professional speaker and consultant, and current licensed therapist in Denver.
Here’s what’s changed since we last spoke:
- I got married! Megan and I got engaged on a secluded beach in Mexico and married at a small ceremony in Jackson Hole (the cover photo is from the reception). She is literally the best thing that’s ever happened to me.
I was worried that I would be alone forever. It was extremely painful to be single and swiping on dating apps a decade after my friends got married and started families.
In hindsight, I realize that two things needed to happen:
1) I needed to become husband material. I was always a bit of a rascal, and while that served me in some regards, it wasn’t conducive to attracting a wife.
2) I needed to stop dating people I wasn’t compatible with.
I’ll write more about both of these in the future but for now, if you are single and afraid you’ll never find your person: I’ve been there. Keep working on yourself and don’t lose faith. I promise it will be worth it.
- I wrote my first book! It comes out in June, and I’ll share more on that soon. I remember being at a bar in undergrad, drunkenly babbling to my friends about how we can observe the cycles of nature to learn about cycles within ourselves. Finally, Danny interrupted me and said, “Dude, shut up and write a book already.” Well, Danny, it took me 20 years, but I did it! I’ll personally mail you a copy.
- Speaking of drunkenly babbling at my friends… I stopped using all drugs and alcohol, including caffeine. The simple truth is that my life is exponentially better without them. Raw dogging life (aka, sobriety) is the ultimate life hack.
- I spent two years working with embodied men’s coaches. Men’s work is hard to describe. It’s a bit shadowy and secretive, many of the coaches are liable to unintentionally lead you astray, and even with a strong practitioner, it involves some bizarre things (think: unbroken eye contact for 10 minutes, acting out the darker sides of yourself in front of other men, or consciously inducing pain to see if you can open your heart amidst intensity). That said, if you can find a good practitioner, it can be life changing. It was for me. I learned how to keep my heart open and my spine strong at the same time. I learned to stop collapsing during hard conversations. I learned how to stay grounded when it felt like the world was falling apart. These days, I practice embodiment daily and teach much of what I learned to clients.
- As a client in therapy, I did my second chapter of really deep work – this time with a Somatic Experiencing Practitioner. The first chapter, which took place in my late 20s-early 30s, was focused on healing inner injuries from childhood. This more recent chapter was focused on removing the barriers to falling deeply in love with life and embracing who I really am. If it weren’t for the second chapter of inner work, I would still be single, and I wouldn’t have a book coming out.
- I spent six years in post-graduate training. First was three years studying Accelerated Experiential Dynamic Psychotherapy (AEDP). AEDP leverages moment by moment awareness coupled with a strong therapeutic relationship to help clients heal quickly. When you watch advanced AEDP practitioners work, it literally looks like magic. Their clients have profound emotional and spiritual breakthroughs without much appearing to happen. Next was three years studying Somatic Experiencing (SE). SE is the art of using the body to heal the mind. It’s the modality that helped me become husband material and learn to love life at a deeper level. Along the way, I also became a Jungian nerd. Jungian psychology feels a bit psychedelic. Jung developed an approach that blends myth, mysticism, and mindfulness to help people move directly into the heart of life.
Yet, despite more therapy, more sobriety, and five years of life… a lot hasn’t changed:
- I still have a complicated relationship to ambition. On one hand, I seemingly can’t help myself. I wrote a book, invested a ton in post-graduate training, and recently upgraded my office and website. Still, part of me yearns to spend my days teaching surfing in Mexico, making just enough today to get through tomorrow.
- As a professional, I still think that giving a shit is the best business strategy. Though I’ve done almost no marketing, my practice has been full since a few months after it opened. Some of this, of course, is luck. But the part that’s not luck is a deep commitment to doing the absolute best work that I can on a daily basis.
- Personally, I still think that the best life strategy is to give as much as you can and trust that good things will follow. This was day 1 lesson 1 with my mentor, JP. That first meeting was nearly 20 years ago, and it’s still shaping my behavior. Of course, I’m a bit more strategic now about providing value. I’ve gotten better at boundaries and more disciplined at cutting toxic people and situations out of my life, but still, I think we’re here to give. And that’s a privilege.
- I maintain that writing responsibly about mental health is deceptively difficult. In fact, this is probably one of the bigger reasons I took a break for a few years. The truth is, what’s traumatizing for one person can be healing for another. And within that, there aren’t a ton of broadly applicable truisms in counseling psychology to lean on. That said, while I was writing the book, I found my groove and I’m back, at least for a bit!
In the coming months, I’ll be sharing more articles, releasing the book, and hopefully taking a trip to Greece and getting new tattoos! But for now: hi. I’ve missed you. It’s nice to be back.